Some of my family and friends gave great feedback about my last post which made me realize I need to take this a little deeper. So this blah feeling can be for different reasons for different people. What I’m talking about isn’t related to just having a bad day or needing a break from society.
I’m talking about that “blah” feeling when you are depressed. When you feel like you are in a deep black hole and no one understands you. When you only want to sleep long enough in hopes that all of the crap you are going through will have just disappeared when you wake up. This is about when your meds aren’t doing what you hoped they would do. This is the type of “blah” I’m talking about. If you have EVER felt that, then guess what. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
Yes I talked about what I do now when I feel like that but what did it look like in the darker days? What did it look like when I saw not even a glimmer of light? Those are the more pressing questions. Let’s see what I can answer.
Those dark days are difficult to remember for me because it is almost like I blocked them out. I do remember some of it though. It is an internal battle you have with yourself. You truly don’t know if you’re coming or going. You don’t want to do anything. You don’t want to talk to anyone. You just want to lay in the fetal position and cry, pass the time away or just sleep for what feels like an eternity.
Getting out of this black whole isn’t easy. It is an individual process to be honest. Some days you will feel like yes, you can make it out of hibernation. But then something pulls you back in. Call it negative forces, the enemy, the devil (give it whatever name you want), but that is what pulls you back in. Let your faith in some type of higher power be your guiding force to break free.
I read the Christian devotions and allowed others to pray for me and also prayed for myself. I’m not saying you have to be Christian to get of things, but what I am saying is that there has to be faith in SOMETHING! That faith is going to be your speckle of hope.
I hope that this little tidbit does help. That is what worked for me to dig myself out of that hole. I will always agree with it’s easier said then done but you gotta start somewhere. Let that somewhere be today! You are worth the fight!
L.D.A.
Comments